Couples therapy is often viewed as a last chance at saving a relationship, when it should be one of the first considerations to minimize problems or avoid them altogether. There are several situations where couples therapy can be the right choice for your relationship.
Even if you are not married, attending some form of couples therapy can help further your attempts at reconciliation. Many unmarried couples who have the goal of staying a couple and possibly marrying in the future may need to resolve issues that lead to the initial separation. Ideally, both people in the relationship should have individual therapy, so they can feel comfortable discussing private matters that may or may not relate to their partner and relationship. Once both individuals are working through their problems individually, they can have therapy sessions as a couple. It is probably best for each person to have their own, different therapist, who is also different from their couples therapist.
Everything Is Fine
It may sound unusual to some people, but going to couples therapy when everything is going fine is one of the best times to pursue therapy. Unfortunately, dysfunction in the relationship or the threat of separation are usually the catalyst for therapy, instead of addressing any concerns and keeping the relationship healthy once both of you have committed to a serious relationship or are married. Working on small concerns now can help improve the relationship, even if you do not feel there are any problems. For example, it is not uncommon to have some communications issues simply because each person has a different way of handling issues or expressing their feelings. Other nuances that might occur during the relationship, such as one person feeling overburdened with household tasks or not feeling like they spend enough time together, can be worked out before they turn into a point of contention in the relationship.
Perhaps the most urgent reason to go into couples therapy is if there is some type of trauma that occurs while you are in a relationship. Examples include the emotional toll infertility can take on a couple, issues that might occur if a partner has been sexually assaulted, health issues, or the loss of a loved one. Some of these issues can seem like they are only directly affecting one person, but they often take a toll on relationships. Entering into therapy before the ramifications of trauma becomes obvious can help with working through traumas and healing. Depending on how sensitive the topic is, one partner may feel like they must keep everything inside, while the other partner feels helpless or shut-out.
Regardless of whether the relationship is going good or bad, when both partners want to make the relationship work, they should be willing to attend couples therapy. Many couples find the decision to have therapy was one of the best decisions for their personal and relationship growth. Reach out to professionals like Randy Carrin, Psy.D. to learn more.Share