3 Important Types Of Intimacy You Need In Your Marriage

Marriage can be one of the best parts of life and one of the worst, and this often depends on how well you are getting along with your spouse. To have a great marriage, you must spend time with each other, learn each other, and have the right types of intimacy. If you feel like you and your spouse are not as close to each other as you would like, you may want to try to work on the following three types of intimacy, which are all vital for a good, healthy marriage.

Emotional Intimacy

While there are many types of intimacy that are important to a marriage, emotional intimacy is one of the most vital types to develop and have in your relationship. Emotional intimacy is what ties you closely together. It allows you to share your thoughts, feelings, and desires. It binds you together as "one" and helps you feel confident with your marriage and safe.

Unfortunately, many married couples do not share emotional intimacy. They lead their own lives and do not even know what is going on in each other's hearts. If you want to feel closer to your spouse, you will need to work on developing your emotional intimacy, and here are some tips that can help you do this:

  • Set aside 20 minutes a day for each other – While 20 minutes may not seem like a lot of time, it can be a good way to start building emotional intimacy. During this time, focus on each other and talk without any distractions.
  • Talk during the day – While each of you are busy working or doing normal daily activities, keep in touch with each other. Start making at least one phone call a day to stay connected.
  • Text – You can also stay connected by texting throughout the day, and this can be helpful even if they are just short texts. You could tell your spouse you love him or her or that you are thinking about him or her.

Recreational Intimacy

A second important type of intimacy couples should share is recreational intimacy. This is the type that allows you to bond while you do some type of hobby. Some couples enjoy hiking or spending time outdoors together, while other couples might like cooking or baking together. It is important to find some type of activity you can do together on a regular basis. This doesn't have to be daily, but you should try to find something you can do on a weekly basis, and it should be something you both really like.

If you are not sure what type of hobby to develop, talk about it. As you talk, you can brainstorm about potential options, and you could even start trying some of them to see how it goes.

Physical Intimacy

A third type of intimacy that is vital is physical intimacy. This is the type of intimacy that sets your marriage apart from all other relationships you have. It does not only include sexual intercourse, but it should also include touching, flirting, foreplay, and kissing. If your physical relationship is struggling, you may want to talk about it with your spouse and try some of these tips:

  • Start holding hands – Holding hands is a great place to start with physical intimacy, and you can do this at home, in the car, or as you walk places.
  • Kiss more – If the kissing in your marriage is down to the goodbye kiss each day only, you need to change this. Try kissing before bed each night, or begin kissing more in the evenings when you are relaxing on the couch.
  • Make it a game – If your sex life is suffering, try writing down things you can do sexually with or for each other and place the notes in a bowl. When you decide to be intimate, each of you can pull a slip out of the bowl and that is your duty for the night.

There are many ways to increase intimacy in a marriage, but it can be difficult to start new routines. If you need help with this, you could make an appointment with a marriage counselor. This is a great way to learn more about intimacy and ways to improve it. Contact a clinic like Associates For Counseling & Psychotherapy for more information.